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Super Duck

Yet Another Bad Idea

(Unoriginal, Too)

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Ignoring the Real World: NFL Playoff Predictions '10
Super Duck
dedalvs
I'm going to put the fact that one of our cars was stolen today (or yesterday; it was allegram's [Update: They found it! And it was pretty much unharmed! We lost our in-car cell phone charger, but that's it!]) out of my mind and instead, focus on something trivial: The NFL Playoffs.

For the third consecutive year, a team whose name is a type of cat is in the playoffs (this year, the Cincinnati Bengals), which is as good a reason as any to talk about my cat!

Okeo is making excellent progress! He now thinks of the upstairs as his domain, and is more eager to come out of hiding when we call for him. And the best part is that he's eating! He ate nothing yesterday at all, but was quite happy to get some wet food today. The only worrisome part is we haven't seen him drinking any water. He has to have drunk something in the past 48 hours, it's just a little troubling. He's a healthy, happy cat, but if he doesn't drink any water at all, he won't be for long...

Okay, now for actual football.

So, back to cats, just how did the cat teams do the past few years...? Starting with the 2007-08 playoffs, the Jacksonville Jaguars, stunned the defending champion Pittsburgh Steelers 31-29 on a field goal with 37 seconds to play, and then were beaten handily by the New England Patriots in the next round, who continued their unbeaten streak all the way to the Super Bowl where it ended in one of the most spectacular Super Bowls in recent memory. Last year, the Carolina Panthers, a dark horse to win the Super Bowl, met an upstart Arizona Cardinals team and rolled over, as the Cardinals continued their improbable march to the Super Bowl, where they, of course, lost. So! What does this say for the Cincinnati Bengals this year...? Read on to find out!

NFC
First Round
  • (3) Dallas Cowboys def. (6) Philadelphia Eagles: The Eagles simply don't have enough, and Dallas is hot.

  • (4) Arizona Cardinals def. (5) Green Bay Packers: The Cardinals were just fooling that last game.
Second Round
  • (2) Minnesota Vikings def. (3) Dallas Cowboys: Dallas is hot, but so is Minnesota, and they've got the better team.

  • (1) New Orleans Saints def. (4) Arizona Cardinals: I hope this match-up comes to be, because the game will be incredible!
NFC Championship
  • (2) Minnesota Vikings def. (1) New Orleans Saints: They just don't have enough this year. They showed real vulnerability in their last three games. Saints beat Vikings (miracles do happen)
AFC
First Round
  • (6) Baltimore Ravens def. (3) New England Patriots: No Welker, no win.

  • (4) Cincinnati Bengals def. (5) New York Jets: Tough one to swallow for Jets' fans, after they just beat the Bengals 37-0, the Bengals giving forth one of the worst efforts in the history of professional sports (and that's not an exaggeration). Jets beat Bengals (this doesn't bode well for the rest of my predictions...)
Second Round
  • (1) Indianapolis Colts def. (6) Baltimore Ravens: The Ravens are one wide receiver away from greatness. Not this year.

  • (2) San Diego Chargers def. (4) Cincinnati Bengals: They don't stand a chance. This one will be a blowout.

  • (2) San Diego Chargers def. (5) New York Jets: This is going to be the best game of the playoffs. Gah!!! The Jets are garbage! And they're RUINING my predictions! Notice I've gotten everything else perfect except for games they play in?! ARGHH! (Though note that this was the most exciting game of the playoffs thus far...)
AFC Championship
  • (2) San Diego Chargers def. (1) Indianapolis Colts: I can't believe I'm even writing this. And yet...

  • (1) Indianapolis Colts def. (5) New York Jets: Yeah, just try to ruin this one, Sanchez. I dare you. I suppose this is appropriate, since if the Colts hadn't rolled over and played dead for the Jets, not only would they be undefeated to this point, but the Jets wouldn't have been in a playoffs (at least, with the way things unfolded otherwise; the Texans would've gotten in).
Super Bowl XLIV
  • (2) San Diego Chargers def. (2) Minnesota Vikings 44-35: Listen, I'd love to see Brees get a shot at the team that unceremoniously dumped him for a rookie, but I just don't see the Saints getting out of that tough NFC. Luckily, we'll be entertained by an all-offense Super Bowl with a curious duo: The quarterback of the future vs. the Great Maybe, and possibly the greatest running back of all time vs. possibly the greatest running back of all time at opposite ends of their careers. There's no drama with this matchup, but it'll be one for the history books. Oh, and, by the way, San Diego will finally break through! Maybe now they'll get that stadium they've been angling for for years...

  • (1) Indianapolis Colts def. (2) Minnesota Vikings 33-28: I don't think this matchup will be as explosive as Chargers-Vikings, but we'll get to see two of the greatest quarterbacks of all time (at the end of the day, perhaps the two greatest ever) play against each other in the Super Bowl. That's not bad! We haven't seen that since Kurt Warner vs. Tom Brady. Colts will win a close one (to go with their blowout the first time).

  • (1) Indianapolis Colts def. (1) New Orleans Saints 44-36: I like the Saints' moxie, but Peyton Manning's the best quarterback ever (that's right: I said it!). The man is unstoppable, and so are the Colts. Their starters haven't looked bad all season. This one'll be a barn burner, and the Colts will come out on top. Congratulations to the Saints—and their fans who've suffered through a half a century of miserable luck. You earned earned this one, beating one of the best teams ever to play the game 31-17.